I sink into my seat. "I don't want to be the nice, hard-working, humble girl anymore."
"You're not. You're nerdy, creative, and bookish. You're not allowed to have traits other than the ones described by your house," he teases. "So don't let me catch you being cunning or impulsive."
I play with my wedding ring. "It's a little late for that."
Joel laughs. "True."
"I know it's a little silly to put so much stock in which Hogwarts house I belong to."
He shakes his head. "It's not, and don't do that. Don't put yourself down like that."
"I'm twenty-two."
"So fucking what? These books mean something to you. They took you out of your life. They gave you a place to belong. A way to look at the world. That fucking matters. I don't make music for the money or the fame."
"Or the groupies."
He sticks his tongue out. "I never picked up women at shows. That's not the relationship I want to have with my fans."
"You don't want them to believe they only love you because they want to fuck you?"
He cocks his head to one side. "Maybe."
"Aww. You don't want to get by on your looks."
"Is that a crime?"
"No. It's cute."
"I don't mind playing that card."
"I saw your show. And that poster."
He laughs
. "That poster is grade A spank bank material. And I get that the hot rock star fantasy is part of why I get to do this. I don't mind—"
"You love the attention."
"Maybe."
"And you're okay playing a role."
He nods. "It lets me spend my life making music. I get to brighten people's lives, three minutes at a time."
"You do."
"Yeah?"
"My sister… when she listens to Dangerous Noise, she has that look. Like she's where she belongs. Like someone understands her."
"Like you with these books."
Like me with Joel.
He's still smiling.
He's still looking at me like I light the stars.