In her feverish state, Julianna struggled through nightmares and hallucinations. More than often, she cried in her sleep. Her demons continued to plague her without mercy. And even when she regained consciousness a few times during the day, she was always confused and drowsy. Rani made sure to check on Julianna every day and each time, she repeated the same thing to me.
“She’s been in that rain for too long, it’s completely normal for her to suffer through a fever like this. She’ll be fine in a few days. Give her time to heal.”
I hated how I couldn’t do anything more than stay by her side.
I fucking loathed how helpless I felt.
I spent the day holding a cold compress to her forehead. Sometimes, I’d drag the cloth down her neck, over her chest and arms, trying to keep her cool. Every day her temperature rose before cooling down for a few hours and then the fever was back again.
While she was feverish, Julianna suffered through three epileptic seizures and ended up wetting the bed twice.
And each time, I carried her to the tub and bathed her, before changing the bedsheets for cleaned ones.
On the fourth day, her flesh was dry and hot. Julianna let out a pained moan, her eyes fluttering open. “Do… you hate… me?” she croaked.
I stiffened at the question. This was the first time she had addressed me directly since her fever had set in. My breath hitched when Julianna brought her hand up, cupping my cheek. Her thumb brushed over my jaw and then my lower lips. “Don’t… hate… me.”
My throat closed. “Julianna,” I practically choked her name.
My heart thudded in my chest, hard.
It fucking hurt.
Her weak voice.
And how fragile she was.
Her weary eyes were filled with pure desperation.
Instead of responding, I rubbed Vaseline over her cracked lips. Like I had done several times for the last four days.
“Please,” she pleaded, before burrowing her face into my neck.
Her lips brushed against the pulse in my throat. Julianna let out a breathy sigh. “I love… the way you… smell. It comforts… me. Don’t l-l-leave me,” she confessed softly, her voice breaking at the end.
“Shhh, I’m right here,” I reassured her fevered self. “Not going anywhere. You just sleep and focus on getting better.”
Julianna made a weak sound in the back of her throat. “Killian…”
“Yes.”
“I wish… our story was different,” she whispered sleepily. “I wish you… didn’t hate me and that… I didn’t lie to you. I wish we could start over again. Julianna and Killian.”
My arm curled around her, my chest rattling with a shuddering breath. “I wish the same too, Princess.”
I didn’t know if she heard me, because when I peeked down at her flushed face, Julianna’s eyes were closed. She had fallen back asleep.
I leaned back into my pillow, squeezing my eyes shut.
Why was I here? What the fuck was I even doing?
Taking care of her… getting close to her again, when I should have long left the island.
I should have let Rani take care of her.
I should have left the night Julianna told me her truth.
Yet, here I was.
I had accused Julianna of being a martyr, but we were so fucking alike.
I guessed we both had a penchant for self-destruction.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Killian
I walked into the dining hall to find the table set for two. That made me pause.
The last time the table had been set for both Julianna and I was before…
Before her truth came out.
Before the masquerade ball.
Was she planning to join me for dinner?
My eyes darted between the two places, finding something amiss. But when realization dawned on me, my fists clenched at my side. There was nothing amiss.
In fact, something that was previously wrong had been fixed.
Instead of our plates being set on either end of the table, so that we were sitting opposite of each other, with a great distance between us – our plates were now next to each other.
While I might have approved of this change before… now? Not so much. I wanted to hang onto my rage, but the more time I spent with Julianna, I was once again allowing myself to grow weak for her.
Every time I tried to put distance between us, somehow, we were pulled together again.
A rustling sound from behind me caught my attention and I already knew who it was. My body recognized her before my other senses did. My heart leaped to my throat as I settled in my chair at one end of the table, without looking back at my wife.
Julianna made a small sound at the back of her throat, before coming forward and taking the seat to my left on the side of the table.
“Hi,” she said timidly, folding her hands over her lap.
Hi? That was all she had to say?
What the hell were we? Two teenagers on our first fucking date?