My forehead creased in confusion and I turned to Maddie. Her eyes were no longer on Alessio but she was staring at the gym door.
“I don’t want know how the other guys look,” she whispered, her eyes wide. As soon as the words were out of her mouth, the door opened and they stepped out.
This time I was the one who gasped. They looked even worse. Maddie rushed forward and I quickly followed.
“What happened?” she asked, horrified.
“Fuck,” Viktor said, rubbing his hand over his face tiredly but he winced when his hand made contact with his face.
“Alfredo is dead,” Nikolay replied, his voice as deadly as ever.
At his words, my breath came out in a whoosh. It felt like someone had punched me in the stomach.
My mind twirled, my vision going slightly blurry. I blinked and gasped, my hand going to my neck as I started to rub up and down.
“What?” I whispered, my voice so little that it was barely audible.
“Alfredo is dead,” Nikolay repeated before closing his eyes with a tired sigh.
My father was dead.
I brought a shaky hand to my mouth as I tried to keep the tears at bay. I didn’t know why I was crying. Tears blinded my vision and I closed my eyes, trying to make them go away.
“Alessio isn’t taking it so well. Hell, I’m not taking it well! This was supposed to be our revenge,” Viktor hissed.
“Oh, dear,” Maddie whispered beside me. “He is doing badly, then?”
“Pretty bad,” Phoenix said.
They were leaning against the wall, all of them deep in thought. But the anger on their faces couldn’t be mistaken.
“You should go clean up. Alessio can’t have you losing it too,” Maddie suggested.
“I should go,” I whispered. My heart was thumping fast against my chest and I had to get out of there. They couldn’t see me break down.
I nodded at Maddie and quickly walked away before they could reply. Closing my door, I leaned against it and sank down to my butt. Pulling my knees together, I placed my head on them and tried to breathe.
My eyes burned with unshed tears and my quiet gasps filled the silent dark room. There should have not been any tears. Not for my father, a man who gave me to a monster and turned a blind eye to my pain. But still, I couldn’t stop the tears.
My chest squeezed tight with pain and the tears fell freely down my cheeks. I cried for him and for the pain he caused me.
I cried for the love I could have had but never experienced because of him. In the end, I cried for me.
He took my peace, my freedom, my everything. Even though I should have hated him, I didn’t.
I just felt sad. I felt empty. Hollow. Weak.
Eventually, I found myself in bed. I stared into the distance, only the lamp on my nightstand was on, casting a soft glow around the room.
I didn’t know how long I stayed like that, but I couldn’t bring myself to close my eyes. I thought of my father and Alberto. I was scared of the nightmares.
I turned around in bed and tried to find another comfortable position, but to no avail. Nothing worked.
Blowing out a tired breath, I rubbed my face in frustration and sat up in bed. My thoughts went to Alessio, and my body instantly grew tense. I could understand his anger and pain. After what my father had done, this was Alessio’s revenge.
He was going through a harder time than me. When I saw him, his pain was obvious and my heart ached.
To see a man like Alessio crumble, it hurt. It was painful.
And strangely, I wanted to offer comfort.
Maybe because I understood. Was it sympathy, or guilt?
I didn’t know, but through my pain, I felt his. And my heart was breaking for this man, who was my enemy.
The irony of it. An Abandonato wanting to comfort an Ivanshov.
My mind was a jumbled mess and I just wanted silence for a moment.
I closed my eyes and the first thing that flashed behind my closed lids was my grand piano. My eyes instantly snapped opened.
That was it.
The piano.
I knew we weren’t allowed in the room, but everyone was sleeping. Maybe I could just sneak in. Quickly getting off the bed, I padded to my door and quietly opened it. Looking left and right, I made sure that no one was in the hall before stepping out.
I softly tiptoed to the next room but immediately stopped when I saw the lights on. The door was slightly opened and I leaned forward, peeking inside.
My heart stuttered at the sight.
Alessio was sitting on the couch, facing the piano in the corner. There was a glass in his hand and he was staring intensely at the piano. He slowly brought the glass to his lips and chugged the rest of the drink in a gulp.