I turned a little farther to get a better look at him. He was watching the cigarette burn as opposed to looking back at me, but his expression was quite serious.
“A deal?”
“Yeah,” he said. “A deal where we both end up retired for real with the women we fight for.”
“The only way that happens is when one of us dies,” I reminded him. “There isn’t a prize for second place.”
“Yeah, I get that.” Arden rolled his head to the side and stared into my eyes. “You can have the trophy—I don’t give a shit about that. I just want to walk away with people thinking I’m dead.”
I knew exactly what he was suggesting. Normally, it wouldn’t be an option because the audience would be aware of any allegiances formed between tournament players and would put a stop to it. This time, they had no idea what we were doing. I still didn’t see how it would work—they’d have to have a body to prove I’d won.
“Don’t you think that kind of alliance has been tried before?” I asked. “They watch for that shit.”
“Not if they think I’m buried on the side of the mountain. They’ll only look for me for so long before they have to take your word for it”
“You’re crazy.”
“Already established.”
“I mean really crazy,” I countered. “You’re living in some kind of fantasy world.”
He glared at me a moment.
“Look over there,” Evan said. He pointed with his finger out near the top of the ridge. “You see anyone?”
I glanced over for a second then looked back at him with narrowed eyes.
“There’s no one for miles,” I reminded him.
“Yeah, I know,” he said softly, “but I st
ill see him.”
“Who?”
“A kid I killed in Iraq. He follows me everywhere. He’ll go away for a while—sometimes for months—but he always comes back when shit gets real.”
I stared at him for a moment until I realized my mouth was hanging open. I closed it quickly.
“Dude—there’s no one there.”
He shrugged.
“I know. I still see him. I have nightmares about killing him all the time. Not just him, but being in the desert, tied up in a hole for months. Sometimes I can’t stop thinking about it, and when I do, I can’t sleep at all—sometimes for days.”
I could certainly relate to the nightmares. Before I had met Raine, I could only avoid them with alcohol. With her around, I slept better than I had since I was a kid. She drove the nightmares from my head.
The next phrase out of Evan’s mouth would have knocked me to the ground had I been standing.
“When I’m with Lia, I sleep better.”
I looked over to him quickly, trying to figure out if he had somehow used his skills of perception to know what I was thinking, but he seemed completely inside of his own head.
“Fuck,” I muttered. “Seriously?”
“Yeah,” he said. His eyes darkened as he looked at me.
“It’s just…well, Raine helps with my nightmares, too.”