“Um no, I love what I do. Despite what you might think, being a cosmetic surgeon is an honorable profession.”
“I never doubted that,” she said defensively.
“I got offered a position with Dr. Pennington—he wants me to come on as one of his partners. No more traveling and jetting around. I’m kind of excited about that.”
“Wow, that’s great, Bullet. I am happy to hear that. Listen, I didn’t want to take up all your time but,” she reached in her purse and handed me the note I had written her, “you said you wanted to explain. I feel like I should hear what you have to say.”
So no more niceties, let’s get down to business. I would much rather spend the afternoon removing that lovely yellow dress and touching that warm, buttery skin but I knew that was probably off the table. “Yeah, after that crazy phone call you got, you deserve to hear the truth. Let’s go sit in the living room, we can talk more comfortably in there.”
I showed her to an overstuffed chair and I sat on the leather loveseat next to the chair. Suddenly I felt nervous. I had to stall. “Do you mind if I go change my shirt? I don’t want the grease to get on the leather. I’d hate to ruin my loveseat, it is pretty new.”
“Sure, go ahead. I’m not in a hurry.”
I left her and walked down the hall to my bedroom. Couldn’t I just lie to her and tell her what she wanted to hear? That would be what the old me did without a shadow of a doubt but this wasn’t the old me. I wanted something real, not the same old bullshit relationships I had in the past. I wanted something real—with Lilly. Damn, this sucked!
I tossed the white shirt in the hamper and reached for a clean one. I stood staring at myself in the mirror. What was I doing? Would she even believe me? I looked up surprised to see her standing in the doorway watching me. There was no mistaking what she wanted. She unzipped her dress and stepped out of it, wearing nothing but a pretty white slip with thin lacy straps. She walked towards me and in a fevered whisper said, “Just once more before you tell me everything. You will tell me everything, right?” I could see the uncried tears in her eyes. I nodded and pulled her to me. I picked her up and carried her to the bed.
“Yes, I will tell you everything, I promise.” I knew I would, I couldn’t do anything but be honest with her. I was pretty sure I loved this girl. What else could I do?
She sat on the edge of the bed and I tossed my shirt to the side and slid out of my jeans. Slowly, I eased her sandals off her feet and the straps off her shoulders. She stood and allowed the silky fabric to fall to the ground. She didn’t wear a bra, just a pair of yellow lace panties. I didn’t waste more time with formalities. I removed them in just a few seconds and scooped her up in my arms, kissing her. I stood beside the bed and picked her up, her toned legs wrapped around my waist. I slid into her easily. We didn’t waste time with a lot of foreplay—I needed her and she needed me. Her arms were around my neck and I couldn’t take it anymore. I fell on the bed with her below me. “Lilly, I need you so bad.”
“I know you do. I need you too. Here I am, Bullet. Let’s enjoy this time together.” She made it sound as if this was going to be our last encounter. I didn’t want to think about that but if it was going to be our final encounter, I wanted to make it memorable. I flipped her over on her stomach and pulled her to her knees. I shoved myself into her again and pumped against her. She whimpered and shuddered against me. She began to push back, bouncing off me a little which thrilled me to no end. I wanted her even more. I grasped her tiny waist and continued to make fast, even thrusts into her. Then I leaned forward, reaching for a breast to play with. I loved her breasts. They were perfect and soft. Suddenly she rolled away from me and pushed me down on the bed. Like a naughty nymph she climbed on top of me and began to ride me with such force it surprised me. She had complete control of the situation and I loved every minute of it. But the quickness of her movements, I could tell she was going to climax soon. Her hands were cupping her breasts and her hair bounced around her. I grabbed her waist to help guide her as she sought her orgasm. “Yes! Go baby! Enjoy it!” She shuddered and moved slower, savoring each wave. When she got what she wanted, I pinned her down again, this time face to face. I held her hands above her head. She had a blissful, lovely look on her face. God, she was beautiful! I felt the familiar surge of heat rise in me and then my release came. I groaned loudly, “Lilly!” I fell on her, kissing her desperately on her lips and neck. She put her arms around me and held me close. As my breathing quieted, I could tell she was crying softly. I didn’t know what to do, what to say. Slowly, I got up and put my jeans on. I sat on the edge of the bed, handing her the delicate white slip. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I am. It’s just been an emotional couple of days. Sorry for crying o
n you.”
“I don’t want you to apologize for anything. I think you have every reason to feel emotional. Tell you what, you get dressed, I’ll go close my garage and we will have that talk. Okay?”
“Sounds great.” I hugged her and kissed her. It might be the last time, I couldn’t help but think.
Once everything was closed up, I walked back to the living room and Lilly was there waiting for me. I sat down on the loveseat again and thought about how to start. I figured I’d start with the phone call and work back.
“When Page called me at the hotel, she told me Mrs. Buckland had a problem with some stitches. I was to meet her, Mrs. Buckland, at the clinic. It’s not unusual for a patient to have some discomfort but it was unusual that she’d want to see me there. Still, it is a service I offer so I went. When I got there, Mrs. Buckland wasn’t there but Page was—she was sitting in my office wearing nothing but some lingerie. I kind of lost it on her and she let me know she was beyond pissed. She threatened to call you if I didn’t stop seeing you but I don’t do well with threats. I didn’t want you to get hurt but I couldn’t have her threatening me. The weird thing was I didn’t even know she was in town. She only comes to your city once a month to do some work for me. I was blown away. Before I could get to you, she had already called. I can only imagine what she told you.”
Lilly’s green eyes were wide with surprise to hear the story. “Kate is right—she’s crazy.” I nodded sadly— it was hard to admit but I suspected it was true. “She told me that you were seeing your patients, having sex with them, she was very specific about names. She said you had sex with Amelia Sheffield and accused you of some lawsuits. She told me that you hired escorts and you had a sex problem.” Lilly wiped at her eyes and her lip quivered a little. I wanted to hold her but it wasn’t the time for that. I let her continue before I offered any explanation. “She told me that you came on to her and that she had refused you multiple times. She basically said you were a predator that liked conquests but you didn’t want anything else. I guess I was unfair—again, not letting you explain what was happening.”
“Well she wasn’t completely wrong, I am ashamed to say. Until I met you, I didn’t want anything more than to get what I could and then get out. For the record, I never did anything with Page. No date, no sex, no nothing. It was only a professional relationship, for me anyway.”
“I see.” Lilly leaned forward, her hands clasped, her elbows on her knees.
“Totally honest here, I never had sex with Amelia Sheffield. Like I said, she was too young and I did refuse her. Like many doctors, I have the occasional lawsuit but none have been found against me. I have had three cases against me and I was cleared on all three occasions.” She breathed a sigh of relief but I continued on.
I looked down at the ground, thinking about how I would explain the rest. I could tell her I was just a guy with a sex problem but I knew it was more than that. This went back to Gretchen and Slate. I figured if I were to have anything with her, relationship-wise, I better be forthcoming. “Back in college, I fell really hard for a girl named Gretchen. I didn’t know that she had a thing for my brother, Slate. Somehow or another, those two hooked up behind my back and they eloped. Before I knew what had happened, Slate and Gretch were married, having a kid and I didn’t get so much as a phone call for a long time. Because of what happened earlier that year, with the wreck, it hurt doubly hard—I felt like my brother betrayed me just when we needed one another the most. That’s no excuse for all that happened afterward but it is a big reason why it started. I got into a rut, Lilly. I didn’t want to love anyone or care about anyone except myself.” She reached over and grabbed my hand. I patted hers but pulled away. “Don’t forgive me yet. I haven’t told you the worst.”
“For about a year, I didn’t see anyone, no dating, nothing, but then it all started. I was a new, hotshot doctor with a big future ahead of me. Women came out of the woodwork to sleep with me. I had sex with some of the nurses at the hospital where I was a resident, then my patients, like Carmen Fuentes and then they started expecting it. It was like sex was a perk for using my practice. I’ll admit that Page did manage my time for me, giving me an extra thirty minutes here and there so she knew what was going on, although I never directly told her about my encounters.”
I couldn’t look her in the face. “There were times when I used Executive Massage. I have been known to go to sex clubs and even hang out with swingers. I admit that I knew Rafe was a swinger but I hoped that you wouldn’t go along with his wishes. I guess in a weird way, I was trying to sabotage us before anything happened, before I fell for you but it was too late. I already liked you.” I paused and allowed all that information to sink in. “I am ashamed to tell you this stuff but I hope that by being honest with you that we might have something together. I don’t want to sabotage us. I want us to happen.”
I waited for her to say something but she didn’t. She wiped tears from her eyes but didn’t make a sound. I continued on— I might as well go all the way. “My friend and mentor, Dr. Pennington confronted me about what was happening. He told me I needed to make some changes so I have. He’s been helping me get myself together—I’m lucky to have him. And I talked to Slate last week. We’re trying to rebuild some trust—I am supposed to go see them for the holidays.” I waited and still nothing. “Do you have anything you want to ask me? Anything at all?”
“I can’t think of anything right now except this. How do you feel about me? Am I just another emotional bandage? Another conquest, Bullet? What am I to you?”
“Haven’t you been listening, Lilly? You changed me. Not your breasts—although they are perfect.” I couldn’t help but grin. “Not your nice body or your sweet smile, I like you. Period. Not for just a roll in the sheets. I like you as a person.” Now I took her hand. “Look at me, please. I don’t have any reason to lie to you. You aren’t a patient, you aren’t a girl I met in a club. I am telling you the truth…I…I love you, Lilly.”
With her free hand she wiped a tear away and smiled. “You love me?”
“I hadn’t meant to tell you that but yeah, I do. I love you.” I took a deep breath, knowing I meant every word of it. She was the girl for me, not Gretchen or anyone else. It was Lilly that I wanted.