“On the subject of children, I always will.” Rebecca tickled the boy under the chin. “I’m nervous, you know.”
“About the child?”
“I worry that when I’m fat and cranky, the things Adam accepts about me will no longer appeal.”
“I told you he’s not the sort to abandon you.”
“No, but I never thought that of Warner either and look what he did.”
Fanny put her hand on Rebecca’s shoulder and squeezed. “You’ll make a wonderful mother, and already are the perfect wife.”
“So would you—if you wanted to be.”
Fanny signed. “That again?”
Rebecca settled the boy on her lap and the pair of them faced her as Rebecca spoke again. “I worry about you being alone. We all do.”
“I’m not alone. I have a busy life, friends and my interests.”
“Yes, you have been keeping very busy. But in a few years…?” Rebecca sighed. “Father will not live forever. Jessica and I might die in childbirth, or from ill health. Samuel could finally leave England as I’ve always suspected he would one day. And Milo, well, neither one of us has ever been close to him. Who will you have to comfort you in your old age? Who will you leave your wealth to?”
“To you, and Samuel and Jessica and Milo and—”
“I don’t want your money.” Rebecca’s stare was piercing. “I want you to be happy.”
“I promise you that I am. I’m doing exactly as I please and lack nothing,” Fanny insisted.
“No, you’re not truly happy. I think you were when Rivers was alive and never since.”
Fanny had been completely and utterly devoted to her late husband. She hadn’t cared about the number of years between their ages, as many other people had been. Rivers had been an exciting man, funny and wise. She’d had a complete life with him. He’d challenged her mind and her soul. “I miss him.”
“Rivers is gone and you’ve chosen to carry on alone. But you can’t live on remembered passions forever. Give love one more chance, I beg of you.”
“I never gave up.” Fanny smiled tightly. “But I think love gave up on me.”
“Nonsense,” Rebecca promised. “You will never find a man like Rivers again, so stop looking for him in the faces of those you meet.”
“I’m not.”
“Aren’t you?” Rebecca handed Fanny the baby decisively.
Liam was a good weight for a child of his age. Fanny actually knew a lot about the raising of children since, as the eldest, she’d had a lot to do with her younger siblings’ upbringing. She tucked Liam against her, assailed by the familiarity of the task…and a yearning she’d thought long buried.
“What is the first thing you consider when you make the acquaintance of a man?”
“Ah…” Fanny began, but Rebecca was on a roll and charged on.
“I’m sure you assess the quality of their clothes as a means to determine their wealth and status,” Rebecca said, ticking off each point on her fingers.
Fanny rocked Liam from side to side. “Is that not a perfect way to uncover a fortune hunter?”
“There are good men who lack funds. Scoundrels can fall in love, too.”
“Like Rafferty did with you,” Fanny teased.
“You know how I felt about him once.” Rebecca shrugged. “A more annoying man I have never met.”
“And yet you have bound your life to his,” Fanny noted. “You became his wife, never to be your own woman again.”