“Thank you,” I whisper back, hugging him a little harder.
Micah tells us he will be back after another game and then be ready to leave. After Micah walks off, I ask Gavin what he and Jonas talked about earlier.
“Jonas was quite forthcoming.” Gavin takes my hand and weaves his fingers with mine. “He told me he’s been in love with you for years. We spent most of the conversation getting to know more about each other. And now, I know he’s a good guy. I also know he won’t be more than your friend because he doesn’t want to hurt or lose you.” Gavin pauses a moment and chuckles. “He also told me if I ever hurt you again, he’d cut my dick off.”
“Oh my god,” I say, slapping a hand over my mouth.
“Yeah. At least I know he’ll protect you if I’m unable to.” Gavin lifts my hand to his lips and presses a few soft kisses to my knuckles. Warmth spreads up my limb, weaves its way through my chest and strikes my heart like lightning. “He also wished us luck. Said this, minus the last couple of weeks, is the happiest he’s ever seen you. And that’s all he wants.”
I swear the guys in my life are out to make me cry. There will always be something I love about Jonas. My love for him is more familial, but love nonetheless. How the hell did I get so lucky? How did I end up with so many wonderful people in my life? Family and friends and people I don’t want to live a day without.
“Well it sounds like you two had a great talk.” And it sounds like they built a bridge and are trying to meet in the middle for me. I hope one day Gavin and Jonas will be good friends. After time passes, I picture them laughing over beers together.
When Micah finishes his game, we decide to leave. We wander through the parking lot and over to my car. Gavin hands his keys to Micah. “I’ll be there in a minute.” Micah nods and leaves us. We stare after him as he walks to the Range Rover masked in the shadows.
Once Micah slips into the SUV, Gavin takes a strand of my hair between his fingers and plays with it. “Go on a date with me, baby. Just the two of us.”
Eve
ry muscle in my body screams at me to say yes. But the wall around my heart stands firmly in place and says we need a little more time before it is just the two of us.
Earlier, I almost annihilated that wall by kissing him, but life intervened. And that little disruption made me wonder if it was a sign I was moving forward too fast. Can’t be sure. If Gavin loves me, he won’t mind if I tell him to have a little more patience. After all, he had the patience of a saint while we were together.
“Don’t hate me,” I say as I squint. “Is it okay if we hang with everyone again tomorrow night?”
Please be good with this. Please, please, please.
He strokes my hair, grazes his thumb along my jawline, then kisses the tip of my nose. “If that’s what you want, baby. As long as I get to spend time with you, I’m happy.”
I sag into his touch. “Thank you.”
He kisses the crown of my head then hugs me as if he never will again. “For you, anything. I’ll see you tomorrow, baby. Drive safe. I love you.”
“I love you, too. See you tomorrow.”
Gavin breaks our hug and starts toward his car, fingers still in mine until distance separates us. As he gets in his car, I get in mine. He and Micah talk a moment until he puts the car in gear.
I idle in the parking lot a moment, waving to Gavin as he and Micah drive off. He hasn’t mentioned it, but tomorrow is Gavin’s birthday and I want to surprise him. I want to host a game night. Ask everyone to bring food and drinks and laughter. Maybe decorate the house and have a cake. Make it one of his best birthdays yet.
Gavin and I may have been apart more than a decade, but some dates will be forever engraved in my heart. Including the day Gavin was brought into the world. And Gavin is definitely worth celebrating.
Eighteen
Gavin
Eight years ago
Today is the happiest and saddest day of my life.
November twenty-first.
Mine and Cora’s anniversary. If we were still together, today would be our seventh anniversary. If it were a wedding anniversary, I would buy her something made of wool or copper. We would be corny like that, buying gifts according to outdated anniversary traditions. Finding unique ways to celebrate our time together.
But we haven’t celebrated an anniversary together in over five years now. Not that I plan to celebrate this date as anything except ours. This day, until the day I die, will be ours.
Fuck.
I want to call her. Am desperate to hear her voice.